We had a really good week. Things are improving and we´re working hard. Satan is working pretty hard, too, though. Sometimes it feels like we have to put forth constant effort, to the point of exhaustion, and sometimes more. I guess that´s the point of missionary work, to do more than you want to or think you can. José Antonio won´t be getting baptized this week, but we´re working for the 17th with him. His baptismal date fell through because he didn´t come to church yesterday. Ramón couldn´t come to church the last two weeks. He almost didn´t come yesterday, too, but in the end we persuaded him to come. He´s been more depressed and lonely than sick and just didn´t have the motivation to go, but in the end he felt a lot better. We showed him the baptismal font after Sacrament meeting and he´s a lot more excited for his baptism on Saturday. When we left him he had the biggest smile on his face, and he has the sweetest old-man smile I´ve ever seen. We´ve been able to see such a change in him. He´s a lot more focused now and it feels like he´s really listening and trying to learn and remember. Prayer is the most difficult for him and still can´t do it by himself, but he´s trying and can see the difference in how he feels when he puts forth the effort.
I think Wednesday was the best day so far of my entire mission. For the first time in almost 6 months I really felt like a missionary. We had training with los asistentes viajantes (the traveling asistants) almost every day last week and I learned so much. We learned a lot of doctrine as well as how to be better missionaries. I left the meeting Wednesday morning changed. I had been praying to know how to want to be here and to make the will of God my own. I don´t want to go through my entire mission with the point of view that I came to be obedient to the will of God and never love the work. It was a miracle for me. It made me think about a quote that talks about the things that need changing in a human soul can and must be only done by God. I noticed the change that happened in my without my doing anything other than pray. That day I had a fire for the work that was incredible. I was excited to contact people on the bus and tract in the neighborhoods. I had a smile on my face the entire day. Obviously this change won´t stay without effort on my part, and it´s definitely not easy, but I know it´s possible and I¨ve had a glimpse of what my mission can really be for me. I want to get this fire back and keep it burning for the next year. (Can you believe that I´m already hitting my 6 month mark and only have a year left? I can´t.)
I feel your prayers for me.
Love, Erin
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